Really? Is that the best that they can do? I think that in our feeble attempts to connect with humanity, we avoid the logic. We avoid the challenge of actually engaging our humanity by having a direct conversation with an individual. Sadly, the coined phrase “beating it around the bush,” becomes the death of our intimacy in stimulating conversations. There are far too many bushes that haven't been attended because we've beat around too long and too far. Pity hey ?
It’s hard. I get it. We sit around with our friends or colleagues at the local espresso joint and naturally slip into the mode of tiny little whispers stated by just one. After the whisper of comments that grows into a loud roar. Before we know it, we are engaged in conversing of the life of another person. Some call it backstabbing, while others call it gossiping, and at best, we can utter the truth that ignorance of social engagement. Well, having said that, engaging with the right social network. That is not the worst. How about your employers? Your boss huddles away in a mahogany styled wood office on the edge of the glass edged skyline view. He murmurs the darkest secrets of your personal life with your colleague. Stings of shredded words spark the initial phrase which leaps to the gasoline fueled evergreen trees that wisp flames to the forest. Your reputation is done. For not the truth but only an assumed thought. The crashing wave of concrete sidewalks splinter up in sharp slivers that cut your soul. The individual. The person in which you hold your judgmental opinion. You never thought to ask the person directly. You didn’t have the courage. You didn’t have the evidence. You didn’t know how to ask. You didn’t even consider other possibilities and assumed your own opinion was fact. This was the death of that person you wondered about.
The individual. The direct question or assumption flies past this stated individual and bounces around your own social networks as if they owned the property value to someone else’s life. Harsh.
It gets even sadder. The ones that you would least think to damage your soul. Those that label themselves as Christians. The alleged “Christ-followers” who douse gossip ridden fuel into the witch-hunted burning of your life. Your own Pastor may have taken what you confided in him with such trust and used this material to paint the smear campaign of your journey through life across the walls of the foyer of the church. Death has become you and it all began because of an assumption that your Pastor thought of you when you confided in him. It wasn’t what you told him rather it was what he assumed. The pity of that man’s thinking has now become your public end. Your Pastor took the power of your life journey and used it to promote his self-implored egocentrically motivated reputation. He didn’t ask you. He didn’t even bother asking about the specifics of what you meant when you confided in him.
Taken out of context. One comment used to fill in the blanks of your life that others did for you.
Ask the question direct. Instead of forming little clubs of gossip tanks around the foyer and encouraging others to follow your lemming like tracks to the cliff, take courage that comes from the One that made you and talk to the individual directly.
You may find answers to your assumed thoughts that you never knew. Perhaps there is more than what you think. I think Christ, as our perfect example, cleared a few examples that we could follow in this vein leading to the heart of our lives.
When you ask the question directly to the person that you are interested in, have doubts about, or question their character, you may find the answer. Look what Jesus did.
…When Jesus saw him lying there, and knew that he had already been a long time in that condition, He said to him, "Do you wish to get well?" The sick man answered Him, "Sir, I have no man to put me into the pool when the water is stirred up, but while I am coming, another steps down before me." Jesus said to him, "Get up, pick up your pallet and walk."…
So how do we respond to this concept? Jesus did not walk away from this man and talk about his laziness to his colleagues. Do you?
When a Samaritan woman came to draw water, Jesus said to her, “Will you give me a drink?” (His disciples had gone into the town to buy food.)
The Samaritan woman said to him, “You are a Jew and I am a Samaritan woman. How can you ask me for a drink?” (For Jews do not associate with Samaritans.)
Jesus asked her a question. He did not just leave and tell his friends about a woman.
As Jesus and his disciples were leaving Jericho, a large crowd followed him. Two blind men were sitting by the roadside, and when they heard that Jesus was going by, they shouted, “Lord, Son of David, have mercy on us!” The crowd rebuked them and told them to be quiet, but they shouted all the louder, “Lord, Son of David, have mercy on us!”
Jesus stopped and called them. “What do you want me to do for you?” he asked.
“Lord,” they answered, “we want our sight.”
Jesus had compassion on them and touched their eyes. Immediately they received their sight and followed him.
So, you know, Jesus asked them some questions.
If Christ, the example, the One, the great I AM, asked questions, never assumed, just asked, what should we do?
I am ashamed to admit that I have on countless occasions taken the lower road through the gutter to avoid asking a question of someone, and spread an ongoing rumor. It is wrong. I admit fault. Since being on the other side, a misfit, a ragamuffin, and so many other names that fellow Christ-followers (stated) have said about me, I learn that asking questions directly to the individual that you have assumed about will be the very action that can create a glorious masterpiece of art that can change the world, and certainly eternity. Perhaps today, it would be appropriate to start? What do you think?
Daniel M. Klopp
Advocate 4 Marginalized individuals & communities globally
Advocate & Journalist
Die Daily to Self
Legacy to leave.